I never had the desire to go to Hawaii.
It just wasn't on my list of places to go. I had no interest in going there for my honeymoon or any other vacation for that matter. In my mind, I had a picture of what Hawaii looked like and that was good enough for me. I didn't have anything against Hawaii it just wasn't my thing…
That said, Hawaii is my mental “go to” place. I have been to my own Hawaii a handful of times.
I didn’t board a plane.
I didn’t fly across the country.
Instead, I had a baby…
Stay with me here for a moment.
As any new mother can attest, the days and weeks following the birth of a baby, especially your first baby, can somewhat blend together. Before long you have no idea what day it is, never mind, remember the last time you took a shower.
Taking a shower is no longer a given. It is something that you now plan in advance and map out strategically. This normal daily hygiene routine is now considered an "accomplishment" when you actually manage to get it done!
I remember one fairly early postpartum occasion where I was able to take a shower and not have to bring the baby in to the bathroom with me or rush out to a anxious relative holding my crying infant.
That shower was my first trip to Hawaii!
I didn't know if the baby was crying or not but if he was, I couldn't hear him.
I was alone, I was free and I was desperate to feel that way.
It was just 20 minutes but to date, it was the best vacation I'd ever taken.
Recently as a postpartum doula, I was working with a particularly stressed out mom. She was having a really difficult time adjusting to her new role as a mom.
I wanted her to feel like her old self even if it was for just a short time. I encouraged her to get out, take a nap, or go for a walk, just clear her mind a bit.
She commented that she could barely remember what day she showered last. I suggested that I hold the baby and she go take a nice long shower. She agreed.
She nursed the baby, passed her off to me and headed upstairs to the master bath. I smiled and said, "Enjoy your trip to Hawaii!" She looked at me like I was crazy...
When that mom emerged fresh, clean and dressed in real clothes for the first time since giving birth, she happily exclaimed, "Oh my God it is like Hawaii in there!" I smiled and knew she found her “go to” place.
Authored by: DoulaLinds